If the husband is a tyrant: tolerate or fight?

Women often suffer beatings of her husband, believing that the situation can change. Vain! Domashny sadist can rein.

Domestic violence can be divided into three types: moral, psycho-physical and physical.



Moral torture is that the sadist always insult a woman suppresses her will in an effort to completely subjugate and destroy it as a person.

Psycho-physical violence - when it is added to the insults and physical abuse.

The physical torture of the most insidious: the husband without cause, "without warning" brutally beat his wife. And this happens not once, not twice, but occurs systematically. Such a person is likely mentally inadequate, and he needed treatment.



I teach life
Men who are mentally harass their wives, usually justified by the fact that they want them well - and blamed them exclusively for educational purposes. In fact, they feel a sense of satisfaction from the fact that causes another pain.



Who is the sadistic? Usually these are people who are afraid of society. This primitive, angry, envious or arrogant person. Society, as a rule, such rejection, and rather harshly. Insult to the whole world for that goes to the repressed anger that the sadist trying to vent on someone. Because outside of the house a man cowardly attack must take on his wife and children.



To delay the weak
During his wife's mental and physical torture of the male include animal instincts. This type of sadist enjoys watching the suffering of his victim.

It is noticed that the men-only environment he can not defend its interests, he quickly folded. Perhaps as a child he was beaten with parents. And now this man is asserting itself on the weak.



Beau did not hesitate
If a man beats his wife without words, without explanation, it is likely to have already been degraded. It is governed by instinct alone, and nothing more. It is a severe mental illness, and stay close to such a man is dangerous. He can easily hit his wife with his fist, knife, ax. These individuals in the future can be dangerous for his family and for society as a whole.



A man who drinks
Tyrant person often does the abuse of alcohol. A man who regularly drinks are not able to account to their actions. Culture, self-esteem he had lost, there are only primitive reflexes.



Quite often you can hear from women: "Before her husband was a changed man - gentle, considerate, calm. And now - just a monster! "But the most interesting, many wives believe that blame vodka, but not the one who drinks and then lash out. Men are happy to use it: 'I do not remember, he was drunk. " As if that justifies his outrageous behavior. Patience wives and impunity sadistic provokes him to further violence.



Alcohol, as a rule, destroys the man's sexual desire. And it - an occasion for jealousy: "If the wife is not with me, then with someone else." And the fantasy that she and her lover can laugh at him, bring him into a frenzy. Convince jealous, to prove that it is not so - it is impossible.



Why did they suffer?
Well, what do women want? Why are they not part with a man who mentally and physically destroy them?



First, married to a sadistic go girls with certain traits and specific family history. If a child little girl saw her father insulted her mother, and she puts up with humiliation, it makes for a conclusion: obedience and humility - good traits. And in order to show them, you need a male aggressor. Such girls tend to choose their husbands in a nice, arrogant, cruel kids.



Secondly, the destruction of the individual women are often invisible to her. In the early years of physical abuse may not appear. But her husband is able to humiliate his wife in the presence of friends or relatives in the circle. The woman still thinks she can control the situation: the misbehavior of his righteous justify his failures, bad mood, stress. In fact, everything is different: the husband knows he is doing. He already got a taste: started to enjoy the consciousness of his power.



Now the tyrant can not leave his wife without money, to forbid her from seeing friends or relatives. Depriving it of its "support group" and knowing that she never complains, he begins to lash out.



At this stage, the woman can still get away from him.



But if it does not, the next will begin an irreversible destruction of her identity. Sadist's not only beating and insulting its prey. Supposedly "coming to his senses, he begins to ask for forgiveness, showering his wife with expensive gifts, and swears that it was the last time.



A woman forgives her husband, but is a bit of time, and all repeats. Since beating alternate with periods of reconciliation, she begins to think that the whole thing ... in itself. It is so bad that "bring" him. Targeting each time becoming more and more sophisticated. And, not finding a way out of the vicious circle, some victims commit suicide or ... kill wife, then sentenced by a court are sent to prison.



Okmotu in Tirana
All home sadists fear of publicity and a specific human intervention from the outside. Remember: in public, and especially in the men's companies, such person - meek as a lamb. Therefore, never hide his misfortune, not confined to himself.



Notify parents of her husband, his relatives and friends about how he behaves with you. Many of his friends can not even guess at his sadistic.

Connect your parents, sisters and brothers. Tell them frankly about the inhuman behavior of her husband, let him shame. The brothers can talk to him purely as a man, a warning.



Refer to the center of psychological assistance, please ask to help you in this situation.



Go to a local policeman, write a request to look into the situation. Methods of influencing the home sadistic police have enough. For example, the district may wear out his daily calls to the department or regular visits to you in a flat at 22.00 with a half-hour educational talk. If the husband threatened to kill, call up the police.



The most important thing - do not give the tyrant rest. Let knows what "gay" life is waiting for him every time, after he aim it at you.



Or maybe he is sick? However, all these methods are valid only if the domestic tyrant has no mental illness. So go to a mental hospital, tell the doctor about the behavior of her husband, talk about how to behave with him. An experienced psychiatrist, even on individual manifestations may suggest the diagnosis. Some diseases are dangerous for others, and for the patient himself (he can turn to anger arose against him and commit suicide). Particularly exacerbated by the influence of alcohol or drugs.



If the doctor suspects have your husband's mental illness, try to persuade him to undergo treatment. And if you do not agree, then the next attack of aggression immediately call the emergency psychiatric care.



The question arises: parting with such a man inevitably? If in spite of medical treatment can not guarantee the absence of outbreaks of rage at your spouse, then the best thing you can do for yourself is to get away from him. No benefits will not replace the most valuable - their lives and well-being and health of your children.

"Beacons" sadistic

The reasons for a person having sadistic tendencies, a lot. This genetic predisposition, and the brutal upbringing in the family, and drug addiction and alcoholism. But perhaps the main factor - this character. And it manifests itself in the first days of their acquaintance. Knowing these "beacons", you can determine whether you will become a new friend home tyrant.



He begins to control you, as a child: "With friends are not met. Do not you dare dye and do not talk to men, even with colleagues, "" Why, when I called you, you did not answer? "," I have to know at any moment, where you are! "," I do not like your friends! " "I do not like your parents!". He does not give you to express your opinion, cries, does not leave you for a minute.

Another indicator of a troubled state of mind this man is his negative view of children, animals and the elderly. You must alert the statements: "Everything - the bastards!", "No Country for Old time at the cemetery," "Children of annoy me," All the dogs would be shot! "

Note whether this person has a sense of humor. Is it just to laugh at himself, over his blunders? Primitive mind is not characteristic. Such a person does not know any jokes or laugh at the jokes of others.

And finally - the existence of intelligence. If the vocabulary of human meager, no hobbies, but only a deep resentment of everyone and everything, the family union with him will not be easy.



What? If you find yourself in his new acquaintance, some of these features, run away as far as possible. Do not expect that your boundless love can change it. Rather, he overhauls you. After a year of marriage a man will break your will, and you will already be difficult to make decisive action - to get away from him.



Thoughts that turn the woman into a victim:

"I could not live alone, I do not have a shelter or profession."
"Such is our women's share: we must learn to endure.
"Nobody must know what is happening in our family. If the husband will know that I told someone about his behavior, he's rage.
"Children should be pope. Even a bad father is better than none.
"Of course, in many ways my own fault. Should not have ... "
"We need to find this behavior to her husband did not arise occasions for irritation.